Life Ain't Fair

Almost all parents have heard their children lament, “That’s not fair” when confronted with one of the thousands of disappointments that come their way. “Why does Jane get to stay up and I have to go to bed?” Why can’t I have a new bike like Charlie?” The disappointments don’t stop as we get older, they just change. “It’s not fair that Marshall gets a car and I don’t” “It’s not fair that Mrs. Johnson gives good grades to the band kids and not the rest of us.”

Like all of us, I have had my share of “It’s not fair” moments. Most have been trivial in retrospect. I don’t think any have been life changing. Over the last two years, however, I have been experiencing an “It’s not fair” moment that has put something in prospective for me. After retirement, I began working part time at a local department store during the Christmas season. After the season, part time became full time. Starting pay was not great, $11 per hour, but the work was easy, it didn’t need to be carried home with me and it was fun talking to customers.

To maintain this pay level, you have to maintain a certain sales per hour. Being naive as to the retail business and basely an optimistic person, this requirement was no major concern. And then the recession hit and business predictably slowed dramatically. My first review resulted in a $.50 per hour reduction. The second review, after the recession deepened, resulted in a $1.50 reduction to $9.00 an hour. Since this was totally unacceptable, I requested and was allowed to go on a straight commission basis. Since then, pay per hour has been averaging $12.50 an hour.

Now this is not written to solicit your sympathy, but to give you a feel for the situation. In the same department is a gentleman, about my age, who constantly produces sales per hour sufficient to warrant $18 per hour, and he is only part time. But, and this is the basis of the article, he works part time three evenings a week from 5:00 to 9:00 and all day Saturday and Sunday. If you are familiar with retail sales, these hours are generally the times of the most traffic, larger sales and thus a higher sales per hour.

You Never Know!

High school class reunions are ____ (you fill in the blank) For me, recently I had my 50th high school class reunion and I had a blast! I was apprehensive about the reunion when I signed up to come several months ago. As the time drew closer, my apprehension grew by leaps and bounds.

I was going to meet people I had not seen in 50 years. Obviously I would not recognize them and properly would even forget their names. Talk about embarrassment! Imagine walking up to someone, looking at their name tag and then saying something stupid like, “Oh yeah, I remember you”. And that’s with the guy’s, imagine how that sounds when glancing down at a woman’s breast!

Fortunately, my apprehension was misplaced. Sure, faces and bodies change but the names came back immediately. The pleasant memories returned and the not so pleasant memories stayed in the background. We hugged and shook hands and slapped each other on the back. Conversations began with, “How are you? What are you doing now? What did you do before you retired?” We really didn’t care what the answers were, we just wanted to talk to old friends and laugh once again. I had one of the major self esteem boosts in my life. Two ladies approached me and confessed they had had a crush on me during our high school days. Talk about grinning from ear to ear!

The Nashville Flood of 2010

Check this video for some idea of the 1,000 years flood we had. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pFjaQoOdJvI&sns=em

What do you really mean?

One of the many things separating humans from other species is the ability to communicate effectively with others. Originally, I imagine communication was very basic. One grunt meant, “I am hungry.” Over time it became important to convey just how hungry we actually were. Surely there was a difference between, “I am starving and on my last ounce of energy. Feed me before I collapse.”, and “ I am starting to feel hungry pains, but can go for a while longer before I will really need something to eat.”. Maybe it was the difference between one grunt and two. Today we use other descriptive words and adjectives. We might say, “I am starving.” or “I am kind of hungry.” .

Before I tell you where I am going with this, allow me another example. Take this test. A little boy has been playing outside. On a scale of 1-5 with 1 being the least, rate how dirty he actually is based on his mother’s different exclamation when he comes in the door.
“You are filthy.”
“You are a mess.”
“You need to clean up a little.”
“Come here and let me wipe your face before we sit down to eat.”
Assuming it is the same little boy, you would guess he either needs a long hot bath or a brief wipe of the dish cloth.

As we go through life, we all develop a style of talking. Some people view life in the extremes; things are huge not big, they are tiny not small, something never happens, something always happens. Seeing the same event or object, some will habitually underplay it, “The mountain wasn’t so big.” and others will overstate it, “The mountain was huge.”. “The pain in my stomach is severe versus I have a pain in my stomach.

Over time, our friends begin to understand how we express ourselves. They understand that when Tom says the fund raiser was a huge success, he means they made some money. When he says the event was an abysmal failure, he really means they lose some money. When Janice says watch your step, there are a few rocks ahead, everyone knows things are going to be perilous. It is all in the words we use.

“So,” you say, “what difference does it make? Why the big deal?